On and Off the Air

January 25

Before this month comes to a close let me try stringing together some things floating in my head. Since today would have been Mom’s 65th birthday, let me make today the day I stop putting it off.

Sister, sister

My sister is getting married in October and has asked me to officiate her wedding. I am over the moon excited and delighted about it but we are both very emotional with the fact that we won’t have our mom around. It’ll be 21 years this June since she passed away and that fact stings more at certain times than at others.

She wasn’t around for my wedding either in 2016 but maybe because I had more years with her and it took place in the Dominican Republic, I felt as though she was there. I had some framed photographs of us in the reception and Christine will be working on something similar to include mom in her wedding.

A little while ago she gave me a proofreading assignment and when she checked it, she had me do it again. Reading her feedback wasn’t easy, it came off as condescending even though that’s not what she was going for at all. Plus my pride/ego was grappling with the fact that I was being painstakingly corrected by my 'little sister'. I knew I had to bring it up and admit how I felt. We had a great, open, compassionate communication about it and I don’t think it will be a problem anymore now that we cleared the air. Christine is very good and she is very good at what she does, pretty much whatever she sets her mind to.

On the Comedian front

-Marveling Mrs. Maisel- so happy for all their wins, happy about season 2 and its finale and as much as I love Lenny Bruce’s chemistry with Midge, he is/was a real life person and so I wouldn’t want the fanfic to go all out and have them hook up. If they do eh, but I don’t think that should be tampered with too much. His DAUGHTER followed me back on Twitter recently, how insanely delightful is that? “All These Shows” is a husband-wife podcast that gives good insight to the episodes as well other shows but I can’t seem to find the link now. I’m also re-watching the first 2 seasons, spacing it out in such a way where by the time I finish, it’ll be just in time for season 3 later this year. 

I’m checking out some more Ernie Kovacs on Amazon, a comedian/actor/writer I heard my mom used to get a kick out of. My dad likes him too I’m sure, but he has a sillier sense of humor- The Three Stooges, Abbott and Costello, Bing and Bob Hope, Red Skelton, Benny Hill, Carol Burnett, The Honeymooners, a show I laugh right along with him- sometimes the nerdier more neurotic stuff like Woody Allen, but my mother seemed to lean towards more oddball, weird comedy or dry, straight-faced absurdism and I think that’s where I get that from. Well, the silly and the absurd certainly overlap (the Ernie Kovacs show was definitely silly) but there was a slight, distinct difference between my mom's and and my dad's sense of humor. 

Let me fast forward to a more contemporary comic now (although  by now she's pretty much a veteran), Janeane Garofalo and how many of her former die-hard fans are deeming her “cancelled”. If you choose to boycott her because you disagree with her stance on something, that’s absolutely your right. I don’t like the whole thing with Louis C.K. either, I hate that he did what he did and then so many times! And that he was protected, defended, etc.

So she defends him, brings up some valid points as well as her own biased hypocrisy and I'm somewhat impressed with her level of friend loyalty that he probably does not deserve but hey, who am I to judge. Maybe he proved to be a superb friend to her over the years or something. So of course, thousands of fans cursed her out on Twitter, throwing the term “cancelled” around and that has always irked me, even with people I truly don’t like, who I don’t feel conflicted about, who I feel deserve to be “cancelled”. Still, my feeling is this: like it or not, people are not TV shows or appointments, not even R. Kelly. This is my main, semantic gripe about that term- it’s indicative of our consumerism culture in its worst, dehumanizing way. 

I have a lot of feelings surrounding Janeane, especially after seeing her live at the comedy club last month. I've been a fan of hers since the mid 90's and have had mixed opinions of her throughout the years. But I've always leaned towards liking her and she has been very influential on me growing up as I was trying to express and articulate myself. Because of her stand-up and interviews, I looked words up in the dictionary more, listened to Elvis Costello albums, read Dr. Mary Pipher’s “Reviving Ophelia”, Nabokov’s “Lolita”, some Simone de Beauvoir, re-considered what it means to identify as a feminist and re-examined Lili Taylor’s work until I decided that she (Lili) was in fact, my favorite actress. 

Fans went and cancelled the beloved Rock for a few minutes before they found out that his speaking against SJWs was a hoax and then he was “back on the air”, back in their good graces again. Not trying to police anybody on the words they choose but asking for us to consider what's actually being said.